Come to nandos julius, You will kill your hunger and have something to keep your mouth bussy
Posted by powachair in Zooms , winnie , toilets , special needs , Showerhead , satirical , satire , political satire , political humour , Mamparra , malema , julius , Julicious , joke , Jakes , humour , humor , housing , Government , funny , Freedom of Expression , fraud , disease , corruption , challenged
FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
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It is a well known fact that the devil is a lier. In fact, that is basically all he can do, lie. So once he has lied enough and convinced people to do his dirty work, he can sit back and enjoy. Who cares if some find him out, as long as some believe, the job is done.
ANC - if there are more than 15 clever people in the ANC at any point in time I'd like to know who they are. The things ANC affiliates do is just mind boggling. Anywhere else in the world, a simple case like Malema's would have been solved already and Malema would be on his knees asking for the job back crying "I'll give the pennies back, I'm promise"
If you have watched the press conference of Malema, or just caught a quick glimpse at it on the news, you would see that everyone sitting beside Malema looks inundated with what's going on around them, they look lost, they look stupid, they don't look like the kind of people you'd want to make decisions with.
In the private sector it takes years of experience to get to a position that Malema and his cronies are in. Talking to people who can't count is simple. I never had respect for the ANC, but now I'm beginning to lose my mind hearing the things they are debating about - it's impossible to talk to people who can't even answer you're questions.
"You are still listed as director of more than 3 companies", "No, absolutely untrue, the newspapers that sleep with a, b and c and the mine owners who have crooked deals made that up". "Sir...erm, it's listed on the company details, their organizational structure, their annual reports, in black and white - you are still a director", "No, the papers were forged"
That whole conversation is as good as this one;
"You are still listed as director of more than 3 companies", "No, my sockses is reds and my trunkses are, is yellow" Speaking to Malema must be very difficult, because he makes no sense at all, trying to be clever all the way. By this time next month the news headlines will have other news on the front page, this possible crime would have been forgotten never mind the facts in front of all of us. If anyone in the ANC says "no, it’s not true" it’s forgotten right there.
It's actually a sad affair, I thought George Dubya was an idiot, at least he could speak and hold a conversation, do yourselves a favour, if you see Julius Malema on TV, in a paper or anywhere...show him the middle finger, because stupid people in any power deserve nothing less!
OS over and out!
I think today should be RIP MALEMA day, so if you have a joke, please add to the bottom so we can make a giant "WE HATE MALEMA" thread
President Zuma meets with the Queen of England He asks her,
"Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips you can give to me?"
"Well," says the Queen, "the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people."
Zuma frowns. "But how do I know the people around me are really intelligent?"
The Queen takes a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy. You just ask them to answer an intelligence riddle."
The Queen pushes a button on her intercom. "Please send Tony Blair in here, would you?"
Tony Blair walks into the room "Yes, my Queen?"
The Queen smiles. "Answer me this, please, Tony. Your mother and Father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is it?"
Without pausing for a moment, Tony Blair answers, "That would be me."
"Yes! Very good," says the Queen.
Back in Cape town , President Zuma asks to speak with Julius Malema.
"Answer this for me. Your mother and your Father have a child. It's not your brother and it's not your sister. Who is it?"
"I'm not sure," says Julius. "Let me get back to you on that one."
Julius goes to his advisors and asks everyone, but none can give him an answer. Finally, he ends up at the V&A Waterfront and bumps into Mark Lottering.
Julius looks around to see if anyone can overhear them, and he whispers, “Mark! Can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and it's not your brother or your sister.
Who is it?"
Mark whispers back, "That's easy. It's me!"
Julius smiles and says "Thanks!"
Julius goes back to Parliament to speak with Pres Zuma.
"Say, I did some research and I have the answer to that riddle. It's Mark Lottering."
Zuma gets up, stomps over to Julius, and angrily yells into his face, "No, you idiot! It's Tony Blair “
Julius and the Pope The Pope and Julius Malema are on the same stage in front of a huge crowd. The Pope leans towards Julius and says, "Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your followers, but go deep into their hearts and they'll forever speak of this day and rejoice!" Julius replied, "I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me." So the Pope slapped him. ____________________________________________________________