Unshackled Thoughts and Musings

Lately I've been having this overwhelming urge to write. Poetry? Prose? I don't know... Content? Fiction? Non-fiction? I'm not really sure... I do sit in front of my laptop for hours on end just strumming my fingers lightly over the keyboard. I do that sometimes, when I don't know what to write, yet the muse is shackled ever so slightly on my left shoulder. Never the right shoulder. I'm sure if she tries hard enough she could break free, but noooo.. She just sits there, quite happily restrained. Laughing. Then when the tapping of keyboard starts to bore me, I'd play around with a few sentences. Deleting them and start again. And so goes the process till I just close the document without saving. I like to write; I like to ramble about what ever tickles my fancy. Or scratches it, for that matter... Truth be told. I don't write hardly enough. So, pardon my ramblings, give me some space to clear the cobwebs out.
Sep 10
2009

Every south african should read this, regardless of race!

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse

This WAS NOT written by me, I cant take credit for it. It was written by a guy I only know as Rellik, we met on www.lavalair.net when I was into the online rap battling thing (yea I can rhyme a verse or two, with relevant multis, internals, punches and wordplay... :P lol) Rellik can also be found on MySpace and DetroitRap.com as well as some other place I forgot about. I'm sure his first album is out by now, hehehe. Oh, and this was written a few years ago, before Obama became president :D

I took the liberty of highlighting some sentences that could've been extracts from some blogs here on myDL..... lol. I hope the irony is not lost.


The Colours Of The World


All My Black Panthers Put Your Fist In The Sky, And Hold It Up With Pride

Ayo... I Hate The White Man... It's Like He Never Wants To See Me Right, Man...
Puts Us Right In The Penitentiary... The Past Two Centuries We've Been Fightin,
Right When Congregation Blended... And When The Declarations Mended, Resignation Pended...
My People Fought For Equal Rights, Since Segregation Ended, The Truth Exactly,
They Label And Last Me... Throw Me At The Bottom And Lower Class Me, But Actually...
Any Race Steals, And Still White Women Clutch Their Purse When They Pass Me.


That's Trashy... In Fact We, Seem To Ignite It... Steam It And Light It, Racism?
We'll Fight It...
Cos Were The Biggest, And The Quickest To Unite With,
Descended Through Generations... Its Spreaded Like Fast Cancer, The Facts Answered...
Strongest Race On Earth, Birthed Malcom X And The Black Panthers, Peacemakers Like MLK...
And Still They Act Like The Triggers Our Friend, But To Catagorize Is A Contradiction Itself...
So The Real Niggers Are Them...




To Grudge We Have A Plan... But Couldn't Budge Me As I Stand, Took Me In The Lies...
But Look Me In The Eyes, Judge Me As A Man, Look At The Mothers And Girls...
The Utters In The Swirl, It's Deeper Than Black And White... Look At The Colors Of The World...





All Of My White Supremists... How Do You Feel?




I Represent The White Clan... No Mistakes About Us, Everything Is Right, Man...
Stuck Between A Fight Stand... A Power Hold, Most Powerful Race Is The White Man,
I'm Telling Vision Clean... They Rape Our Women, Here Em Yelling Listen Scream,
Something I Can't Handle... With Their Own Channels On The Television Screen,
They Pull The Info Up... Of Slavery, And The Bravery Roll
The Indo Up, Always Stand Outside,
So When I Hit Westside... I Roll The Window Up




I've Never Cracked A Whip... Still Want Reparations, The Fact Is Sick, Being Black Is Bitch...
Most Of Them Are Useless, And Their Music Rap Is Shit, Locked Up In Prisons...
They'd Need Bail Or Bread, Sales Or Lead, Fish Scale Or Spread... So If They Not Successful By 25,
They're In Jail
Or Dead, No Evidence Yet... Of Anything Equal, They Make The Residence Stress,
And Evident Mess... Ended Segregation Decades Ago, And Haven't Had A President Yet...


To Grudge We Have A Plan... But Couldn't Budge Me As I Stand, Took Me In The Lies...
But Look Me In The Eyes, Judge Me As A Man, Look At The Mothers And Girls...
The Utters In The Swirl, It's Deeper Than Black And White... Look At The Colors Of The World...




ReLLiK, Tell These Cats How Stupid This Motherf**** Racism Shit Is, Get Em!


These Thoughts Are Stupid... Then You Ask Me Why I Had To Do This? Cos It's Gonna Take Hard Work...
With Dedication To Make It Through This, All Men Are Created Equal... Now The People Have To Get It,
But I Can't Kill Racism By Myself... If Your Not With Me Then Forget It, Racisms Alive, I Feel The Pain...
Need Some New Leaders, To Lead The Game, Speed The Change... Because Black, White, Or Brown... We All Bleed The Same...



I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every seconde of it...




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Sep 08
2009

Insomnia vs Nightmares

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse


The night ages gracefully
Yet sleep evades me.
I rest peacefully
Until a scream awakes me.

Restless nights, tossing and turning;
Waking hourly.
Subconsciously I’m afraid
my nightmares will devour me

Days merge into one
due to lack of precious sleep.
Blurred senses, cluttered thoughts;
My sad reward to keep.

So I’ll grab a pen
And give life to my thoughts
Sadly it’ll be of blood and pain
And struggles fought.

And I’ll try to calm my mind,
bruised and broken;
and dream of a better life
with eyes wide open



I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every seconde of it...




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Sep 07
2009

Im a junk collector of note!!

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse

It's true! Junk!

I moved into my apartment on the 2nd February. So if my maths wont let me down now, I've been living here for 7 months and a couple of days now.

I'm moving again this weekend. From Apartment nr X to Apartment nr XX; in the same building. Okay, so how hard could that be, right? I mean, it's not like I'm gonna have to pack and move boxes upon boxes upon boxes. It'll be more effective to pack my stuff in open crates, carry it up to the next floor, and unpack it in my newly paid for, slightly bigger apartment.

For the heavier stuff, like bed, table, fridge, couch, bookshelves, etc, I've already batted my eyelashes at my strong male neighbours and they're more that willing to help me with that too. (I mean literally batted my eyelashes. I might not have a killer body or a good looking bank account, but my eyes contain all the power that any 6ft blonde blue eyed supermodel could ever hope to have. Eat that, biatches! lol)

So, packing: sorted. Heavy lifting: sorted. No, problem, right?

WRONG!

I'm a junk collector of note. Papers!! My goodness, I have pieces of paper and receipts everywhere. Folders with newspaper clippings, and lists upon lists upon lists. And little scraps of paper with strange ideas hastily scribbled. Paper everywhere!

And I have too many stuff. Sure its pretty and all, but do I really need it? Candles and candle holders and reed baskets and wire&bead creations (okay thats not actually so bad: I received a compliment about my decor style from my landlady last week And instead of displaying it on bookshelves and table and other cliched surfaced, I've taken an entire wall to display said bead and wire and some other creations on.)

Books! Everywhere! (Might I just strongly add that i DON'T consider books to be junk) But it's a bitch to move hundreds of books. I have more books than shoes, clothing items and kitchen utensils, combined. Yes, Its that bad! I dont have enough bookshelves for my books.

So, ja, one can just imagine how much I'm looking forward to this weekend, to carry the mountain of contents collected in this tiny apartment up to a bigger apartment.

Oh my word, can you imagine how much stuff I could fit into a bigger apartment..... I moved 3 times before. Every time I promise myself I'm gonna get rid of more that half of my earthly possessions and start afresh in my new place. start afresh minimalistically, that is.

And it usually works out for the first 3 months. Then, suddenly, I realize I have more stuff now that I moved with 3 month ago.

Okay I'm now relatively charged up. Lemme go get a big black rubbish bag and start throwing our.... *sigh*



I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every seconde of it...




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Sep 02
2009

blogging vs social sites

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse


I can see an interesting debate in the making, between Mr Zilla and Mr Source. One believes sites like facebook and twitter will ruin it for serious blogger, the other believes those sites are our weapons, not our enemies.

I find it hard to pick a side actually. Regarding the debate, not the people behind the debate. lol. I do think of myself as a blogger - try to, at least - but I also see the benefits of using social networking sites to promote one's blog and/or sites.

Apart from blogging, I'm also trying to use my facebook account (and the group application in particular) to promote my art and photography and poems. Though so far the goddesses of good luck and fortune ain't been on my side....

The upside of social networking sites is that attracts huge amounts of internet users. The downside, unfortunately, is exactly the same. So if you can direct all those users to your little corner of the world wide web, then good for you, you're on the upside part of things. Its just gonna take so much more effort and work to reach and redirect all those millions of people. And to keep em interested.

A challenge, anybody?



I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every seconde of it...




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Sep 02
2009

for help with voicemail, please press 1....

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse



Ever noticed how ridiculously long it takes these days to get through to a Vodacom operator? In the good old days, had I a problem, I would've dailled 111, pressed 1 for English, 0 to speak to some non-roboty and voila, problem solved in less that 2 min.

My 111 call duration today was 32 minutes. Sure, I did eventually get through to someone with a human voice, but most of the call went something like this (just remove the etc's):

Welcome to Vodacom's customer care.
To learn how to recharge your account, to check you account balance and time window, etc, please press 1
For help with voice mail, sms, or mms, press 2
For data products free email, modem connect card (list continues) press 3
to block a line, get puk nr etc press 4


So I press 3.

For assistance with vphone life press 1
if you wish to make use of internet on your cellphone press 2
for vodacoms free email service
for help with a data card, using your phone as modem, iburst modem support, black berry assistance, press 4
to repeat these options press 9.


So i press 4

Welcome to vodacoms dedicated call centre
for all broad band related products, such as voucher redemption, data cards, etc press 1
for message and content services, like email, blackberry, or the iphone 3g press 2
for account and billing enquiries, or information on how to register you sim card for rica, press 3
to repeat information press 9.


So here, just to be difficult and in the hopes that someone might actually answer, i refuse to press anything.

Sorry, you have not made a correct selection. Please listen careful and make your selection.
For broad band...
.

Still I press nothing.

We notice that you are still experiencing trouble making your selection. We will now route you to a consultant for further assistance.

And Voila. Stubbornness pays. I shudder to think how many other options I'd have to go through....




 



I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every seconde of it...




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Aug 30
2009

wanted; and taking back control...

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse


This is me, taking back control of my life. What the fuck have you done lately?


Thats my favourite quote in the movie Wanted.

Ever seen it? With Angelina Jolie, Morgan Freeman and James McAvoy? That movie based on the graphic novel? I've seen it numerous times, and it gets better every time I watch it.

No, this is not a review, but I'm sure no matter how hard I try there'll be some spoilers, so if that bothers you, dont read any further. But thanks for the click anyway :P

Tom Long from the detroit news had this to say:

"Wanted may be the most aboslutely stone bonkers, crazy-good movie of the century. Or it may be a gargantuan piece of trash. Chances are its a combination of the two. But man, does it rock. The level of invention and energy in this movie makes your typical Hollywood blockbuster action flick look like little girls in pink dresses petting fuzzy bunnies in slow motion... Wanted takes a leap of faith - actually, it takes about 10 leaps - and it certainly isn't for everyone. It's bloody, far-fethed, loud, leering and half mad. But if you're into hardcore action, it doesn't get any better than this."

My thoughts exactly, Mr. Long.

So it goes like this....

Wesley is a 24 year old guy who works in a dead-end cubicle job, who takes meds for panic attacts and who's girlfriend cheats on him with his best friend. A very sad case. He is tracked down by Fox (Jolie) and told that his father was an international assassin, one of the best, and they need wesley to track down his father's killer. (There is, of course, a twist, I'll refrain from spoiling it. lol)

After his brief interview with the fraternity of assassins, he returns to his job, not really knowing what to do. Till he finally snaps, tells his boss off in such a pleasing fashion, and on his way out hits his so called best friend in the face with a keyboard, and the letters of the keyboard spell "fuck you" as they fly through the air.

He then returns to the fraternity to receive all sorts of training; hand combat, guns, knife and getting rid of a life time of bad habits. So he really settles into his new life as an assassin, till he discovered that the fraternity twisted facts about his father, lying to him so he could merely be a means to an end for them. He decides to take out the big mean bad guy (Freeman) and sommer all the corrupt members while he's at it. Fox (Jolie) curves the bullet in such a way that she kills all the fraternity members, including herself, but Sloan escapes.

This is how wiki describes the what follows next:
Wesley, penniless once again, does not know what to do with himself. While he provides a voice-over, the audience sees Wesley at a computer in an office, searching the internet for his own name, much as he did at the beginning of the film. ("Six weeks ago I was ordinary and pathetic just like you. Who am I now? Account manager? Assassin? Just another tool who was mind-fucked into killing his father? I am all of these. I am none of these. Who am I now? This is not me following my destiny. This is not me following in my father's footsteps.") Sloan appears from nowhere and points a gun at back of his enemy's head. At that moment, the man turns around and is revealed to be a decoy. ("This is definitely not me saving the world. ... This is not me. This is just a mother-fucking decoy. This is me taking control — from Sloan, from the Fraternity, from Janice, from billing reports, from ergonomic keyboards, from cheating girlfriends and sack-of-shit best-friends")   Sloan is then killed by Wesley using a long-distance untraceable bullet, exactly in the manner that Cross killed Mr. X in the prologue. Similar to the comic, the film ends as Wesley turns to the camera and breaks the fourth wall, saying, "This is me taking back control of my life. What the fuck have you done lately?"

And thats the movie (in a nutshell) but there's so much more to it than merely hardcore action, blood, guts and guys who like killing people. The main attraction for me is taking back control of your life when you're living a lie. I'm pretty sure though that I'm not heir to a line of assassins, but the concept is pretty universal.

Usually we turn out to be our own worst enemies. We can't shift the blame to those who walk over us, because we allow them to do so in the first place. (when I say "we", what I really mean is "I" lol)

We are everything that everybody else wants us to be but nothing of what we truly are. I guess in the simplest form "taking back control of your life" would include being true to yourself. Growing a pair and facing up to the changes you'll have to make in order to be YOU.

Small things. You don't have to tell your boss to go bad F-word herself or start training intensely how to flick bullets off with a knife blade (although that would be cool, I could so be a Jolie type assassin in a next life.)

I could make the necessasry changes.
I could [quote] be the (wo)man. [/unquote]
I could be ME.

I could.


So, what have you done lately?
 



I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every seconde of it...




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Aug 28
2009

Social Networking - an open invitation for criminal activity

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse


Its already been reported that most social networking sites leak personal information. Its even more shocking that about 70 to 85 % members keep the default privacy settings, exposing their profiles and personal information to anyone willing to take a peek. Now in a perfect world when people on your friend lists view your information the worst that could happen would be ex lovers stalking your latest romantic escapades and sneaky moms trying to follow their children's every move.

Also consider that 4 our of 10 people use social networking sites with status updates to inform their friends about their daily whereabouts and holiday plans. So what's the problem, we share that information with our friends anyway? Ya, but we don't live in a perfect world either, do we?

No. Didn't think so. How many people on your friend lists do you actually know personally? In most cases your "friends" turn out to be online acquantances, a friend of a friend, or complete a stranger (as often the case when you play online games, such as facebook's Farmville, Mobwars, MafiaWars and Vampire hunts [on a side note, when I logged into facebook yesterday I had 89 requests to join farmville. by the time i logged out, 94. If I get one more friggen farmville request I'm deleting the whole bunch of you!!! lmao)

Another study also showed that out of 100 "friend requests" sent to strangers selected at random, 13% were accepted on facebook and 92% on twitter. 17% of users surveyed posted their residential address on their profile pages.

Now throw into the mix GoogleEarth and Street while telling the whole world what your residential address is and that you'll be away for 3 weeks. A professional criminal's dream....



I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every seconde of it...




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Aug 25
2009

Blogging paves the way for measuring happiness

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse


Many scientists have struggled for decades to devise a system for measuring "collective happiness." I mean, how exactly does one go around measuring something like that, apart from interviewing and studying individuals. But then again, our moods change so quickly, the outcome wont always be accurate.



Aug 23
2009

seems my luck aint changed yet.

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse
So lets recap.

The past few weeks at work wasn't really my idea of something pleasant. Then the strike broke out and suddenly it was only me and the boss around to do 10 employees work. We we're supposed to close the office yesterday, but instead head office ordered us to open the doors. And continue a days' work, knowing we're only two.

My nokia decided to kick the bucket (actually I dropped it) and the samsung threw in the towel (actually I dropped it in the bath) and my laptop is also acting up. My 8gb USB flashy (sue me, flashy sounds cute) got stepped on and my digital pen is missing. The tablet on its own is pretty useless and I cant afford a new set just yet. My camera's lense is fuzzy. (sure, all of above can be fixed but most of it requires some sort of excess finances which I dont have. And really, when all of the above seem to happen in shorts periods of time, one really cant muster up the energy to even care anymore)

About two weeks ago I slipped and sprained BOTH my ankles. And its still painful. I'm really living up to my clumisness factor these days.

My creativity and inspiration disappeared, even though I have a logo to finalize and a movie poster to draft. I havent written anything decent in ages. Poetry or otherwise. And my digital art skills are also turning into a rusty mess.

Oh, and to top all of that, I've been feeling uncertain about something and someone that has been a very important factor in my life for the past couple years. This is not the place for soppy details, but I just don't feel the feelings are mutual anymore. Trust is important for me, to be able to place my trust in someone. I dont give second chances but this with the exception to the rule. Lately I've been wondering if I should've given that 2nd chance. and the third... and the fourth... And I'm just not sure if I'm gonna give a last chance anymore. Whats the use if I'm not even "recognized?" If you're ashamed to say to the world "this is C and I love her" then stop wasting my time.

Okay... So I'm gonna end this entry now before it turns into a mushy mess and try to walk away with some of my pride and humour intact. lol...

(PS. my phones will be in during the week for repairs, and unless I can get my hands on a spare one I'll be pretty much mxit and internet-less. [I'm gonna TRY and use the time to create enought stuff to keep my deviant art followers mesmerized. I need to art more!] So dont miss me too much. I'll refrain from jumping off any cliffs and when I return it'll be with a well adjusted sense self again that befits all grown-ups and maybe even with an arsenal of informative and relevant blog entries again ;)
Aug 21
2009

SAPO strike and why I'm glad about it :D

Posted by ShackledMuse in Untagged 

ShackledMuse


Our office was abuzz with debate on Wednesday when we received word that the CWU (Communication Workers Union) was arranging a National Stay Away Strike against SAPO, starting 20 August. Most of us agreed to continue our regular work schedule, some wasn't sure when whether they wanted to strike or not, and 1 lady in particular was very adament that she's gonna stay away. Yet, everybody showed up for work yesterday. Including the adament one.

Today, same thing. All of us reported for duty. Roundabout 1pm I heard a terrible commotion from the counter area. Apparently some CWU members and picketeers showed up to take photo's of us working. Also claiming that they'll deduct from our salaries because we're not partaking in the strike. So everybody suddenly decided that they're gonna start striking right then and there. (this was about 12:45) Excuse my ignorance on these matters, but say I work for the South African Post Office, can any other external party or union deduct anything from our salaries? Surely If they do the Labour Court would like to hear about it?

Anyway. So everybody packed they're things up and balanced their counters and off they went (in the process trying to sweep me along too. I like my current income thank you very much. And I want my full salary at the end of the month. No work no pay.) So after the dust settled, There were only three of us left.

What can 3 employees accomplish on our own? Nothing much. All we could do was close the doors and put the "Sorry for the inconvience" posters up and finish our work for the day. Area office confirmed that if 80 % of the work force partake of the strike, the remaining 20 % may go home, with no serious consequences. So, thats why I've been at home since 15:00 *big grin*


 



I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every seconde of it...




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